Do not disturb

Daisy was laying next to me on the couch and Alex threw his shirt over her head and she laid like that for an hour. This little girl cracks me up.

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Picture Day

Happy 3rd! Its picture day. I had alex take my belly pic but the poor guy had to take about 50 of them just to find one I half way like. I do have a bit of a belly but it still looks like fat so I had a hard time liking what he took. I just turned 14 weeks this past sunday which officially puts me in my second trimester. Yay! I am still nauseous as all heck but have not as of yet had to hurl, although sometimes I wish I would just to make me feel better. I've had a couple of really bad headaches along the way but have survived due to an amazing man who lays his hands on me and prays until they go away. And I'm very sad to say that I've already gained 15lbs. I'm not to worried about it though cause I will go back on plan after the monster is born.
Its fun when I lay on my back to feel my uterus poppin out, and it is growing so fast too and you know its funny cause when my bladder is full the baby really just sticks out far! I think the little sucker is doing the back stroke over the top of my bladder, little cutie.
I went to DES yesterday to find out why I haven't received insurance yet and do you know they had the nerve to tell me that my insurance had been dropped cause I was making too much money! I said uh NO I'm not even working and when I was working, I still qualified so why are they doing this? Then they said I should have received a letter of cancellation, which I didn't, it was crazy and it did not make me happy so I caused a bit of a fuss. Then the same people that were trying to hurry me along said, oh well were just the middle men, only your case worker really knows what's going so here's her number, you'll have to call her. Sheesh! So I have called her twice now and will become a stalker if I have too until she gets back to me.
I decided to call the ladies clinic thru banner good sam hospital and they told me the initial visit is 650 dollars! Help Me Jesus, that is so not what I wanted to hear.
What I have decided is, if helping me does not benefit the individual I'm asking help from, then they pretty much could care less and it is my job to make them care. I am a very non confrontational person BUT I am feeling the beast rise up within me cause 4 months later I still haven't seen a doctor. So look out world, if you hear a loud roar don't fear, its just me getting things taken care of. *wink*
Hopefully I will have some good news in my next post. Be good kids.

CINDIE

Rant

Just a quick rant from a hormonal pregnant lady. It is 10:30p.m. And my neighbors and their children are having some sort of happy, happy, cute little shin-dig right outside my window. I think they're carving pumpkins with all 21 of their family members and their 50 children. I'm pretty sure the adults are drinking too cause that's how most adults teach their children how to relax and have fun. (sarcasm ). Now the babies are crying cause they are cold and tired, (get a clue parents).
Well how come I'm laying in bed trying to sleep and these people think that just cause they are "having fun" that the general respect rule of 'shut the hell up at 10pm, doesn't pertain to them?
I think there should be some sort of marketing ploy in the media to convince people to get inside and shut at 10p.m. They could make it heartfelt like the hallmark commercials or sad and "poor me" like the lawyer commercials. Whatever works. And speaking of media, they should use the same fear tactics that they're using on us about the H1N1 shots, and instead make people afraid to offend their neighbors by being loud and obnoxious late at night.
So I'm sending out a slightly peeved, gain a grip of respect, memo to all who may ever read this........when its 10 p.m. No matter who you are, what nationality you are, no matter how old you are or how much fun you're having......at 10p.m. Turn off your music, go inside, and shut the hell up cause I'm trying to sleep! Sheesh!
Cindie

Things are coming together

Do you see this stroller? This is our first thing for the baby that alex n I bought. We had it put away on layaway for a couple months now, until we could slowly get it payed off. Its a Jeep liberty 3 wheel stroller and this is what I will use to push the little munchkin around in when I'm out on the track continuing in my weight loss journey. I'm pretty excited to get back in business .
This past week has been stressful and amazing all at the same time. To start, my dad came over last weekend to help Alex get his truck running. He spent about 85 dollars on the truck just to get it running. Then on top of that he gave us a 100 dollar gas card! We were humbled, embarrassed and incredibly greatful all at the same time.
Then Thursday our landlord called us to find out where last months rent was. Alex explained that his job closed for 2 weeks for maintenance and reseeding (he works at a golf course). Would you believe our landlord brought our rent down to 100 dollars for the month of november! Holy Cow! I am continuously humbled.
I was so sure we were gonna get evicted and have only my parents to go too. Now we can catch up and then move out in peace like we had hoped. Thank you Jesus! All last week I was a nervous wreck, I felt like I needed to make something happen but alex is such a man of peace and trust in God so I followed his lead and just thanked Jesus for the miracles He has for us and look what happened. I have grown so much in my faith since I met this amazing man. Wow!
In other baby news, I got my birth certificate turned in and now I'm just waiting on my insurance papers so I can take them to the OB and prove I'm insured and then at that point schedule an appointment. Tomorrow I start my 13th week, the last week in my first trimester, incredible.
My nausea continues to torment me, my house is a mess because of it and so am I. I look in the mirror and am a little disgusted with what I see, but I just don't feel good and don't have the strength to fix myself up. Sob sob, wrought wrought! Sorry for the depressing drama.
Hey! Can you smell christmas in the air? I can and its still in the upper 80's here in phoenix. I love this time of year! This year is gonna be a whirl wind too. First there is halloween, then thanksgiving, then christmas, then new years, THEN around feb. 14th my sis in law is due to have her little girl, and then May 2 I'm due to have my little pumpkin. Wow! Exciting times.
Ok daisy I'm coming! My dog is begging me to take her out to tinkle. You guys have a great day!

CINDIE

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12 weeks

I forgot to add my prego info on my earlier post so here ya go.
I am 12 weeks as of yesterday. According to my baby book I only have one more week till I'm out of my first trimester. Wow!
I have shamefully gained 10 lbs already, no excuses here, I have used pregnancy as a free for all. I will have a lot of work to do when this is over.
I am still very nauseous which keeps me home most days. It seems to be getting worse cause I use to be able to just eat something and it would go away but now it feels bad no matter what and I can't tell you how many times I've gagged when brushing my teeth. Its not pretty. Ha Ha!
I have a gut but I'm sure most of it is the 10lbs I've gained, however I am beginning to feel my uterus down at my lower belly which means this baby is growing! Hooray! I can't wait to have a big baby bump and feel this munchkin moving. I can't wait to hold her/him, I can't wait for the family to meet him/her too. Aaaaaaahhhh! This is all so exciting!
I'll post another belly pic on the 3rd.

Cindie

Glimmers of hope

Well I got my butt out of bed at 6:30 this morning so I could head over to the DES office and turn in my birth cert. It took an hour just to turn in the paperwork. Crazy waiting lines. It is completely humbling and almost dehumanizing to have to have govt. Insurance but I am learning to walk humbler and appreciate things more.
I made it thru the wait and got my papers turned in and now I wait for my letter confirming my insurance. Thank you Jesus.
Our move got postponed a little bit cause alex's work closed down for two weeks which means we don't get a paycheck this week, so were unable to put the money down to move in. BUT and I say that very excitedly, alex got a second job at pep boys! Yay! He's headed out today for his training. So give us a couple weeks and we will be back in business .
I am learning how to wait on God rather than feeling frantic and making things happen in my own time. We owe rent, electricity, gas, phone and car insurance all coming up super quick and here we sit with nothing for a couple more weeks. This should be interesting.
Ha ha! What a crazy learning time. But Jesus has never let us down and we choose to follow His plan, than make up our own and watch it fail. Ya know.
Talk to you soon.

Cindie

Finally!

My mom called me today and said she got my birth certificate in the mail. My first response was excitement cause finally I can get insurance and get to the doctor. My second response was irritation with california state for taking longer than the agency my mom went thru. Cali. State really should get their act together.
So monday I will go to DES and get this ball rolling. Yay! I can't wait to see my kiddo's heartbeat. I'll keep you posted.

Cindie

Im moving

Not to worry, my blog is staying the same, but I and my fiance are moving to another apt. I found an apt I wanted to check out on craigslist, and while waiting for the landlord of that apt. to get there, we walked down the street to another set of single story apts, and checked them out. they are quiet, and in a peaceful neighborhood, the landlord was super genuine and nice, the owner is a bit controlling and obnoxious but hopefully we wont have to deal with her much. Luckily she doesnt live on site. Anyhow, we liked what we saw, there is even a pool in the complex, (way exciting!) We went back today to put the deposit down and we will start moving in on the 25th. Gosh thats two weeks. Help me Jesus! Our rent will be 100dollars less than what we are paying now. I am concerned about my dogs though. we kinda had to lie a little bit in order for them to except us. we didnt tell them they were pitbulls and we told them we had small dogs. hmmmm. So im concerned. I was sobbing last night at the thought of getting rid of them. Who could ever love those kids like Alex and I do? Shoog needs me. I am the love of his life! So, yeah, Im concerned about them, also because the baby will be here in about 6 months and shoog is the more aggressive of the two, I would never want my baby to be harmed. Argh! I just have a lot to think about. I think mostly I need to chill out and stop worrying. I seriously dont deal well with change.
So we start moving in on the 25th, were gonna have to recruit some help cause I dont want to do any heavy lifting and hurt the baby. I would appreciate any happy thoughts or prayers you want to send my way.
Oh! listen to this! Yesterday alex and I stopped at a yard sale and looked at a really cute, well taken care of, changing table. I asked how much it was and they said 10 dollars! WHAT! We snatched that up in a hurry! Things are starting to come together for this little kiddo. Thank you Jesus!
ok,,, take care you guys, talk to you soon.

CINDIE

Gorgeous days

How cute are my dogs eh? Things around here have been quite uneventful. I feel bad for not posting much, but there really isn't much to talk about. I'm still waiting on my birth certificate, the highlight of my days are waiting for the mailman to come, Ha Ha, I should probably consider getting a life.
As a weather report, the weather here in phx has been amazing! I whine and cry about it all summer long, begging God to move me out of here and too a cooler place. Then october hits and my whole world changes. The AC gets turned off, windows are flung open, my dogs are happier, I am happier, the world is perfect! Today while taking shoog out to tinkle I caught a cool breeze and I wished I could bottle it up and keep it forever. Life right now is perfect! The temps have been 60's in the morning and 80's in the afternoon. Such a huge difference from 90's in the morning and 110 in the afternoon. So anyway, that's what's going on around my side of the world.
Until next time
CINDIE

Picture Day

   Tomorrow I am 10 weeks along.  I still haven't been to the doctor, Im still waiting on my birth certificate to come in.

   Alex and I got approved for WIC which is a program that allows us to get free milk, eggs, cheese, cereal, fruits and veggies, beans, etc.   all things that aide in the development of the baby.  We were completely humbled to qualify cause its been real hard to buy food lately.   We were not able to pay our rent this month, so that is a bit scary.  The land lord said she'd work with us, and our lease is up next month.  Im not sure if she'll let us renew or if we'll have to move.   These are crazy times but I know it will all work out.  It always does.

    check out my side bar, I posted another belly pic.

enjoy

Cindie

9 weeks

Well as of yesterday I am in my 9th week, that's the start of my third month. Wow!
I still haven't been to the doctor yet, I'm still waiting on my birth certificate to come in so I can get insurance. Hey if you are a man or woman of prayer, I'd love it if you'd mention me in your alone time with Jesus.
Let's see, what can I tell you about my symptoms.....well the most exciting thing is I am no longer spotting, I still get real sick to my stomach if I don't keep my belly full so I've already gained about 10lbs. In the beginning I was craving sugary foods all the time but I'm pretty sure its because I had been dieting for so long that I kinda felt free to eat whatever I wanted. Now however I crave salads and healthy stuff. I am not a big chicken or meat kind of girl but the other day I craved chicken pretty bad so I got a chicken salad. I defenitly feel better when I eat better.
I can't really tell if my belly is growing because the baby is growing or if its because I have gained weight. I'm up about 20 times a night (exaggeration) to pee which causes insomnia so I nap a lot during the day.
Alex is still so excited to be a dad. He talks about it a lot and posts cute little comments on facebook and he talks to my belly, telling the baby to behave in there and he tells the baby "I love you" a lot.
Before Alex's mom passed away he promised her he'd name his first daughter after her. Her name was Margarita which means pearl in spanish. In the beginning we liked Avah Margarita for a girl but more recently we have become fond of Margarita Grace and we'd call her Maggie. Cute huh! I think so. As for a boy we like Zane but haven't fully decided on a middle name. I want my sons to have strong, powerful names. Zane means "God is gracious". I love that!
I haven't been working which I love! Alex is trying to get a second job and has a pretty strong lead at a local PeP boys. I pray he gets it. Pray with me k?
I need to start walking again too. Maybe when this first trimester is over I will get out and start exercising again.
Until next time,
Cindie

motivated by fear.

I don't know if I've lived a very sheltered life or if motivation by fear is a new tactic. I have been noticing this A lot in media recently, I just saw a commercial for the Dr. Oz show and the trailer said this: "how many women could be living with cancer and not even know it! Dr. Oz will tell you if you are one of them." now don't get me wrong, I am all for cancer awareness and taking care of my body but when I heard this commercial, I was immediatly discusted! Is your show so sad and sorry that you have to make me feel scared into watching it? Seriously!
I even had to stop going to the internet to find out what each spot and cramp I was feeling with this pregnancy was. I got to the point were I was so scared I was gonna have a miscarriage cause so many women put their horror stories on the pregnancy pages of the net. What on earth! I had to go into deep prayer and worship to erase that crap out of my mind and heart.
One day I was reading the blog of the adoptive mother of my cousins baby, I had gone back in her archive to re-read her amazing story. She spoke of her inability to have children and her her broken heart and then she told of the day she was told that she was chosen to be a mom to my cousins son. The scripture she kept quoting was Ephesians 3:20 "Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us.......". I dwelt on that verse A Lot and it became a part of me and the fear of miscarriage faded away.
Psalm 27:1 says "The Lord is my light and salvation; whom shall I fear? The Lord is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?". And 2 Timothy 1:7 says "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and a sound mind.".
So, I say all that to say this, fear tactics disgust me! I will not be moved by fear and I hope you won't either.
Cindie

Guess what!

I went today for my food stamp meeting and it turns out that my insurance meeting was scheduled for the same time. Yay! So I qualified for insurance yay, but I still have to wait for my birth certificate to come in which could take up to 12 weeks. Boooo!
So I have to wait a bit longer but at least I know I qualify for insurance. As far as food stamps go, we needed it to help buy groceries. We qualified for 16 dollars a month. *laugh* thanks uncle sam for your generosity to the barely middle class. Its good I payed my taxes all these years so the drug addicts can eat plentiful while the barely middle class have to starve. Go Team!
Ok, ok, its not that bad but it was fun to say.

Cindie

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Waiting game

I figured I'd explain my insurance situation. I went to the crisis pregnancy center to have a meeting about getting govt insurance for me and the baby. After my meeting I learned that I had to wait for a letter to come in the mail that would give me a date stating when my appt. With DES would be to get my actual insurance. Its confusing but this is how it works.........I had to wait a week to have an apt. At the crisis center to find out that I have to wait an uncertain amount of time to get a letter stating when my apt will be at DES. Once I get that letter I have to wait anywhere from 2-4 weeks to have the appt. Then I still can't have a doctors apt until DES sends me another letter with my insurance number on it. This could be a 2 month process of waiting, all the while there is a baby growing in my belly who really would like to have a check up with the doctor.
Oh yah and the doctor won't even see me until I show proof of insurance at which time I have to fill out a questionnaire and then schedule an apt. For the actual appointment . I may be 20 months pregnant before I get a doctors apt. *wink*
So I pretend to be patient all the while silently begging God for a cup of " hurry up!"
I'll keep u informed of what's up.

Cindie

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